Remember My Post....

About how I had difficulty making close friends. Well today is a perfect example of why I avoid trying.

I have a friend N who shares many of the same mental health issues I do (depression and anxiety). She is a super sweet person and our kids get along great. About a month ago she started to isolate herself and did some things that really worried me. I asked her husband about her and how she was doing because I was so concerned. I later found out that about this same time, her and her husband were going through a messy separation.

Fast forward to this past week. I have tried to get a hold of her several times without luck. I finally sent her a message and asked if something was wrong. Her response was simple. She is mad at me because I spoke to her husband about her mental state. I have begged her to call me so that we can talk but so far nothing. I have been in near tears all day.

Now, I have no idea what her husband told her. According to her, he can be very verbally abusive and hateful so I have a suspicion that what he told her is very exaggerated and possible even completely wrong. I cannot get a hold of her to explain to her my feelings of concern, and my version of what was said. She has been ignoring me for about a week so it's not like I can even say that she needs to cool down before she will talk to me.

So, I put myself out there and try to develop a relationship and this is what happens. I feel like I have failed yet again. I might as well just accept that I will never have anything more than a casual relationship with someone. Now tomorrow we are both supposed to be at a birthday party. If she continues to ignore me I won't be going. N has been friends with the family much longer than I have, and it wouldn't be fair to them for us to bring our awkwardness into their son's first birthday party.

I am really hoping I hear back from her tonight. I would love to work on this because I do think we had a good relationship. I realize I probably shouldn't have asked her husband about how things were going, but it was truly done with only love and concern.


***UPDATE***
So after emailing her once more explaining to her how important her friendship was to me; requesting that she just call/text/email me; and sitting on FB with her logged in for about 2hours while I was also logged in (perfect time for her to chat) she has completely ignored my requests. I guess Max and I will stay home in the morning. Add another failed friendship to the list; reinforce my feelings of isolation & loneliness and go to bed feeling sorry for myself.

Happy Monday to all.